Pretending to be a pro & the inspirational lady who started this journey

Ten years to the date, the world nearly lost a wonderful lady.  It wasn’t until a few years ago, I even got to know about her when our paths crossed by similar interests and friendship ties on facebook or myspace or what ever it was at that time.  If it was not for medical intervention, she would not be here living and breathing and neither would I be here on word press, it is because of her and her words that gave me that inspiration and passion to write.

When I first met her she went by her modelling name Galatea but I knew her as Krista, the camera loved her, who would have known that only a few years before she was involved in a horrific 100mph T boning in a car leaving her both physically and mentally broken.  Having seen the pictures of the car, it is even a miracle that the medics got her out.   Without going into great personal detail, it basically shattered her body, bones fragmented all over the place like a gory jigsaw puzzle, it left her depended on people to do even the most basic of tasks for her.  Her mind was that of an adult but her body had been returned to that of an infant, not even being about to take their first wobbles of a walk.   I cannot even imagine how scary and painful that must have felt for her, to be rendered so helpless and vulnerable.

Most of the scars at the time could be hidden under blankets, but even her pretty face had been ripped, her eye socket had been badly torn off, but looking at her now you would even struggle to see a scar.

Bit by bit, medicine and medical intervention fixed her physically but they can never patch up the soul after an event like that, she still lives with demons in her mind, she is still in pain, she is still learning to walk properly but she is an almighty fighter and due to this she is an inspiration of how to never give up even when everything in the world is black.

She began working on the mind, she grew in wisdom and it in turn has helped her with her damaged spirit.  It wasn’t until I found her on WordPress that I actually learned the story about her, her troubled past, the accident, the recovery and the journeys she made in real life and in the mind.

She is a writer, she has doubts at times about whether she is any good, but in my mind, hand on heart, the way she writes is like a river flowing over the sand, it just flows so seamlessly and beautifully, I could read her pages for days if I could.  Her use of language is exquisite, the way she frames her dialogue like it is meant to matter, and it does.  She writes from the heart about things that hurt her, personal tales of sadness and tragedy baring her soul to whom even is out there in the void.  It is never easy to say it hurts, but to write it down just confirms it even more.   It is not all sadness and despair, you can see where she picks her self up, shakes her fist at the world and screams “I want my life back”, and boy, the world heard because she is alive and kicking it’s backside with a huge beautiful smile on her face.

It is because of her writing, that I am here today writing this, she inspired me to open up to the void and just let go, say what is in your heart.   I love to write but I had grown lazy, my spelling is awful, my sentences just run on and on and as for the use of an apostrophe, well, the more the merrier it seems, but I enjoy it and that is the important thing.  I does not even bother me if no one where to ever reads this, it would be nice if they did, but I wrote this because I wanted to write, and it only seems very fitting that I should write about the one who kicked my writing into action.

I have shot Krista a few times now, some of my best portraits have come from her, and sadly they are on my other hard drive in another country so I had to pinch these images off my facebook page, hence the quality.  She came to stay for a couple of days and all I can say is that she is one of the nicest and most genuine human beings I have ever had the pleasure to meet.  Talk about a wicked sense of humor and amazing story teller.  She just shines like a beacon of positively and openness, an instant friend, so easy to talk to about anything and damn she is beautiful inside and out.  Krista, thank you for fighting, thank you for the words, thank you for the friendship but most of all thank you for being an inspiration of strength, love, honesty and just being you.

Day thirty – Myself 30 days later (more like 60 days)

A very, very happy afternoon friends in the void, what a fine sunny day it is today.  Ahhhh, it is so nice to feel the warmth of the sun on the back of my legs as I write to you today.   Oh and yes, the rhino has left the building, at last.

_MG_7448s copySo this is it, the last day, a full circle to where you found me all those 60 day ago, back to me, me and me again.   It seems so odd that this all turned out this way, I wasn’t going to do a blog, I wasn’t going to write anything, I was just going to put pictures on facebook and go tadah that is it, but I personally got so much out of this that I no way regret in any way I went about it.  In fact, in short, I am rather proud of myself for sticking at it.

I have been told by many people out there, I should get my name out in the world, but to be honest I am a lazy bones at wanting to be noticed because I fear drawing in the wrong people.  But here I am, I created my own little page in this world, I’m getting noticed by you kind people, and for the first time, I actually want to make something out of not only this, but me.

I will let you into a little secret, I told no one apart from my mother that I have been doing this exercise, and the reason why is, I want to make a whole new set of friends, that do not know me, or my work as yet.   Without bragging I have quiet a few photographic friends and model friends and friends of their and friends of their dogs and so on, and although I am extremely grateful for knowing them, and having them in my life, I just want to new crowd, people who know me for my work or words and not necessarily knowing me because they feel they have to out of friendship.  Of coarse you may think, oh they could just type my name in and find me, but as I said I have told no one about this, and they know may only know me by my photographic name not my real one, so few people actually know Roubey Hammond, she is not even on facebook as yet.

The other thing that I have got from this amazing personal adventure was that this was just going to be a personal thing, I would put pictures and say a few words and then sign off again, I didn’t really bother me if anyone looked at my page because this was just for me, my feelings, my memories, my ramblings, my way of seeing the world, but when people did find me, it actually felt REALLY good, it actually felt like I was doing what people wanted me to do and get notices, horray ME!!.  It didn’t make me feel self conscious either that people where now watching, because I do know you and you do not know me, this would be something that would normally bother me, but this time it was so much different, I love that there is someone across the other side of the globe saying “hello”.

The biggest thing that has really made me feel fantastic, is how this exercise has re kindled my love of the written word.  I have always loved it, but _MG_7457s copyI find myself so easily frustrated by writers block and terrible grammar.  I have always struggled with the words, ever since I was child, people thought I was slow and they would be right, but I was always a daydreamer and still am, but I do listen and take notice very well.  I could never read out load with other people aorund, the teachers made me read all the simple books, but when it came to going home and writing a report, I would come back with page upon page of details so deep that I had to be taken aside and asked, what does this word mean, and I would tell them, I would describe it and they would still give me the simple books.  I was in no way thick or stupid, I was just shy and unnoticed because of this.

I am a good reader, I love reading, I feel it sad that we are loosing so many libraries and book shops only to be replaced by electric books and computers, there is something charming about turning a real page and sitting there with your mother or father or who ever told you stories as a child, and being so interested in what was on the next page, or would stop just as the story got exciting, “wait till tomorrow to see what happens”.   My fiancé gave me one of these Nook books before I left the US and it took me a long while to get used to it, I still rather have a real book but it is nice not having to put on a night light to read, plus it is so might lighter for flying but I am scared still of breaking the screen, something I do not have to worry with a real book.  Plus I can store some of my pictures on it.

It seems that children no longer get that bed time story, or in some cases a story at all, because there is just not enough time any more.  Children rather relax before bed on a computer or with television instead of roaming a treasure island in a mysterious land of book imagination.  If I could have children, I would read to them ever night because words are powerful, “the pen is mightier than the sword” least I think that is how it goes, but it is true, unless you are in a sword fight.  Then to add insult to injury, we massacre words to text speech, one of my art professor told me that one of his students, a year ago gave in her final paper entirely in text speech, a whole three page concise major final paper at college reduced to nothing more than LOL and OMG.  I am not going to lie, I have LoLed many a time but I do not confuse it with proper language, like everything, there is a time and a place, and writing a final paper is certainly not a grown up thing to do, lets just say she was rather surprised that the professor failed her for that.

_MG_7462s copyThere is one thing I do have trouble with, and that you have already probably noticed, I love to write, and so because of this I write too much.    I know people phase out at a certain point and some only look at the pictures, which is fine with me because that is basically all I am trying to show, but in a business world, it may not be looked on as being proactive.  You see, I do have a very real dream to word in the photographic industry, the ultimate epitome of that dream would be working for the National Geographic, to be able to travel the world and see some of the most amazing sites and take pictures to show the world, oooohh I would quite happily sell my left side of my body to be even let inside their doors.  Who knows, maybe one day.  On the other hand, if Vogue or someone of that ilk came knocking on my door, I certainly would not refuse.  As usual it is about not only knowing people (something I am lucky enough to have a few strings and connections) but getting myself out there and putting effort.

I have so many images hidden on hard drives that never see the light of day, it is about time, they got their 15mins of fame.  Now I am not to be all big headed and say I am the best photographer since sliced bread, I do know a lot of tricks and what makes a picture look good, I am a perfectionist, I have been doing this for quiet a while and now I have a diploma so far to prove it, hoping for my masters one day. I take pictures because I want to take pictures, to enjoy taking pictures of the thing that make my life tick.  The ones you have seen here in this challenge, well they where all just for fun, I did not spend hours over them, I did not put the dedication I usually put into my proper images, it was for a personal thing to do for 30 days, an excuse to get the camera out and the brain working.   This is not the end though, I have caught the blogging bug and certainly will return with more words and more pictures, just you wait world, Roubey Hammond; RouPyks Muse is putting a name and a dirky face on you.

Thank you for the 60 days of adventure, heres to the rest of life.